One of my students has caused me a big ache stomach from laughter.
The question is "What is the difference between a mainframe and a server?"
Her first sentence describes the position of the switch in my lab (the physical position, eg. its on the left in the box attached to the wall). The second sentence describes some sort of super-computer that doesn't yet exist (to my knowledge at least) and mentions that it is under what she refers to as the mainframe.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Exam Bloopers part 2
Q: Dorothy is environmentally conscious. What type of monitor would she prefer to purchase? Motivate your answer.
A: LSD ... (the rest of the answer was fine so I gave them the mark).
A: LCD or CRT because has less carbon mechanisms.
Q: What is open source software?
A: It is software that can be opened with another software.
A: Open source software is a software that gives you sources when opened.
A:The form of software with lower branding name compared to high classified brand names, but offers the user a great deal of important information.
A: It's a type of software.
A: LSD ... (the rest of the answer was fine so I gave them the mark).
A: LCD or CRT because has less carbon mechanisms.
Q: What is open source software?
A: It is software that can be opened with another software.
A: Open source software is a software that gives you sources when opened.
A:The form of software with lower branding name compared to high classified brand names, but offers the user a great deal of important information.
A: It's a type of software.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Exam bloopers part 1
Disclaimer: I don't teach these kids English. The answers come from different kids, which despite their obvious lack of computer knowledge are still loved and appreciated.
Q: Both computers have Super Multi DVD writers. Would it be possible to write CDs?
A: No, it would not be able to write CD's because there is a major difference between the two. DVD writers write videos and CD writers write music.
A: Yes, you just have to go to the settings and select write an audio CD.
Q: Which device in computer A will be used to connect to the office network?
A: The Windows Vista Business.
A: Integrated WLAN which is also called "Bluetooth".
A: Computer B
Q: What would the webcam be used for?
A: To capture live images in the business and there are to see if any happens.
A: To communicate as a social network or to protect the environment to protect / prevent crime.
Q: Both computers have Super Multi DVD writers. Would it be possible to write CDs?
A: No, it would not be able to write CD's because there is a major difference between the two. DVD writers write videos and CD writers write music.
A: Yes, you just have to go to the settings and select write an audio CD.
Q: Which device in computer A will be used to connect to the office network?
A: The Windows Vista Business.
A: Integrated WLAN which is also called "Bluetooth".
A: Computer B
Q: What would the webcam be used for?
A: To capture live images in the business and there are to see if any happens.
A: To communicate as a social network or to protect the environment to protect / prevent crime.
Friday, March 6, 2009
4 days and who knows...
It's been 4 day (according to my husband) since my last entry. I thought no one read these as I never get feed back. But now my husband is asking me to write again - probably so he can laugh at my bad spelling and grammar. He always rips me off about it, saying "I can't believe that someone with a degree in English has such bad grammar". In my defence, my degree is in English literature and not linguistics! Thus I can read a book and analyse it in terms of its social, ideological, philosophical etc... implications. Correct grammar was something that MS Word always did for me. Sad as that might be, I had other things to think about, like why Moby Dick was a white whale and how Jane Eyre has a colonialist discourse.
So far this week:
Monday - I went to Jeffery's Bay with my Belly Dance instructor, Janka, to help her teach a lesson and then give a demonstration. It was a lot of fun. We got home really late and then my husband made me do the dishes before could eat. I didn't enjoy that as I was tired and hungry.
Tuesday - I had a Troupe rehearsal and then afterwards I went to the shops and bought some fish for supper. When I got home I found my husband had slept the entire evening. I was tired and so I sat for 30 mins before starting supper. I watched a bit of the Amazing Race. Rob and Amber are in the lead of course. They are a really good team. Amber sometimes reminds me of my sister Deborah - perfectionist and does a little victory dance when she's happy.
Wednesday - I usually go to this Access course waste of time thing after school. It usually is about 3 hours long, but this Wednesday the lecture (hopefully) caught onto our hints and condensed it into 45 mins. It was so much better. I really hope she continues in this manor. When I got home I found that my dear darling dog had eaten and thrown up his friend's, Magenta's, collar. He didn't eat the buckle and name tag, just the strapping. He then ate it again and looked miserable for the rest of the night.
Our neighbours were also attacked in their home that night. Now they have a security guard outside their place. My parents want us to get personal panic buttons.
Thursday - We went to our lecture on training nervous, aggressive and environmentally aware dogs. We learnt that we're not doing everything wrong, but there are a few things we need to change. We put some of it into practice last night and Charlie seemed to comply and actually enjoy it. This did mean I had to miss a belly dance practice, but I'll survive.
Today - I have a rehearsal for a dance gig after work. We are dancing at a 50th birthday party on Saturday night at the Malabar community hall. I don't know what I'm dancing yet but I'll find out tonight.
I'm not sure if my teacher likes my solo I did as she hasn't commented on it yet and hasn't asked me to dance it anywhere. I guess I'll have to see tonight if she wants me to do it at the party. Otherwise I'm gonna have to work harder at my choreography skills.
I also found out that I actually don't have to do detention duty as I'm only part-time staff. I've already done this year so I told the teacher in charge she owes me big time.
We had a bomb drill earlier today. The girls were told it was only drill and so they strolled out slowly and laughed at the whole process. Last year when we had a real bomb scare it was a different story. Anyway, the gardeners and maids "blew up" as they didn't leave the premises - apparently a drill is too much effort for the person in charge of them.
I've had a craving for something all day and I can't identify it. That's bad when you can't identify something you are craving. Maybe it's sleep disguising itself as a food.
I weeded the back of the garden yesterday. The weeds were becoming a bit too tree like for my liking. It was quite a workout and Charlie enjoyed digging in the holes created by the missing plants. Now I have a pile of weeds with no place to go and stiff muscles from pulling.
Lunch is coming up soon and I'm hoping the tuck shop lady doesn't try out one of her new recipes on us today. Sometimes it's just too weird to think about eating - or it's curried. Many a stomach ache has been caused by a curried soup!
So far this week:
Monday - I went to Jeffery's Bay with my Belly Dance instructor, Janka, to help her teach a lesson and then give a demonstration. It was a lot of fun. We got home really late and then my husband made me do the dishes before could eat. I didn't enjoy that as I was tired and hungry.
Tuesday - I had a Troupe rehearsal and then afterwards I went to the shops and bought some fish for supper. When I got home I found my husband had slept the entire evening. I was tired and so I sat for 30 mins before starting supper. I watched a bit of the Amazing Race. Rob and Amber are in the lead of course. They are a really good team. Amber sometimes reminds me of my sister Deborah - perfectionist and does a little victory dance when she's happy.
Wednesday - I usually go to this Access course waste of time thing after school. It usually is about 3 hours long, but this Wednesday the lecture (hopefully) caught onto our hints and condensed it into 45 mins. It was so much better. I really hope she continues in this manor. When I got home I found that my dear darling dog had eaten and thrown up his friend's, Magenta's, collar. He didn't eat the buckle and name tag, just the strapping. He then ate it again and looked miserable for the rest of the night.
Our neighbours were also attacked in their home that night. Now they have a security guard outside their place. My parents want us to get personal panic buttons.
Thursday - We went to our lecture on training nervous, aggressive and environmentally aware dogs. We learnt that we're not doing everything wrong, but there are a few things we need to change. We put some of it into practice last night and Charlie seemed to comply and actually enjoy it. This did mean I had to miss a belly dance practice, but I'll survive.
Today - I have a rehearsal for a dance gig after work. We are dancing at a 50th birthday party on Saturday night at the Malabar community hall. I don't know what I'm dancing yet but I'll find out tonight.
I'm not sure if my teacher likes my solo I did as she hasn't commented on it yet and hasn't asked me to dance it anywhere. I guess I'll have to see tonight if she wants me to do it at the party. Otherwise I'm gonna have to work harder at my choreography skills.
I also found out that I actually don't have to do detention duty as I'm only part-time staff. I've already done this year so I told the teacher in charge she owes me big time.
We had a bomb drill earlier today. The girls were told it was only drill and so they strolled out slowly and laughed at the whole process. Last year when we had a real bomb scare it was a different story. Anyway, the gardeners and maids "blew up" as they didn't leave the premises - apparently a drill is too much effort for the person in charge of them.
I've had a craving for something all day and I can't identify it. That's bad when you can't identify something you are craving. Maybe it's sleep disguising itself as a food.
I weeded the back of the garden yesterday. The weeds were becoming a bit too tree like for my liking. It was quite a workout and Charlie enjoyed digging in the holes created by the missing plants. Now I have a pile of weeds with no place to go and stiff muscles from pulling.
Lunch is coming up soon and I'm hoping the tuck shop lady doesn't try out one of her new recipes on us today. Sometimes it's just too weird to think about eating - or it's curried. Many a stomach ache has been caused by a curried soup!
Monday, March 2, 2009
Chillies and Chocolate Cake
On Saturday I did my first professional belly dance gig. It was for the Chilli Festival. There were 7 of us dancing in varous combinations and styles. I did a traditional Egyptian duet with Melanie and then I was in the final group dance which was a drum and veil dance.
It was a bit weird standing there with my belly exposed to a whole lot of strangers, but I managed and danced my heart out despite the cold and cough I've had all week.
Saturday night my husband and I went to my father-in-law's for a poker game and chinese. There were 7 of us all together. My husband won the game, however, it was a friendly and so he won nothing. I get bored and so lose so that I can go do someting else - in this case - play with my sister-in-law's kitten. She is so cute and cuddly and reminds me of my cat that lives at my parents house and so I don't get to see her very often.
Sunday started. My sister-in-law brought her dog round for a play date with my dog and then we did some work on a piece we want to perform later this year. We then back to her father's place for left over Chinese food and attempted to watch the first episode of the Simpsons. I was terrible. Not funny etc...
That afternoon we had my husband's brother and his fmaily come round for tea and chocolate cake. The nieces played Wii while the adults talked but inevitably that structure falls apart and I end up having my hair ripped from my scalp by 2 well meaning and happy girls.
Now the left over chocolate cake in a bone of contention between my husband and I. I see it going into my belly and he doesn't. Oh well
It was a bit weird standing there with my belly exposed to a whole lot of strangers, but I managed and danced my heart out despite the cold and cough I've had all week.
Saturday night my husband and I went to my father-in-law's for a poker game and chinese. There were 7 of us all together. My husband won the game, however, it was a friendly and so he won nothing. I get bored and so lose so that I can go do someting else - in this case - play with my sister-in-law's kitten. She is so cute and cuddly and reminds me of my cat that lives at my parents house and so I don't get to see her very often.
Sunday started. My sister-in-law brought her dog round for a play date with my dog and then we did some work on a piece we want to perform later this year. We then back to her father's place for left over Chinese food and attempted to watch the first episode of the Simpsons. I was terrible. Not funny etc...
That afternoon we had my husband's brother and his fmaily come round for tea and chocolate cake. The nieces played Wii while the adults talked but inevitably that structure falls apart and I end up having my hair ripped from my scalp by 2 well meaning and happy girls.
Now the left over chocolate cake in a bone of contention between my husband and I. I see it going into my belly and he doesn't. Oh well
Friday, February 27, 2009
Another snotty hot day
Although I'm beginning to get better, I can't help complaining about the combination of a cold and the Frikkin' hot weather we are having. The temperature is not particularly bad, its the humidity and comfort level that is causing us to wilt into - well, something in my garden that were once flowers and are now something else. Even the weeds aren't surviving.
Yesterday I went to belly dance class after skipping troupe practice because I was dying. I managed fine and only had a problem with my snotterfall when bending over and stretching. This bodes well for the Chilli Festival tomorrow afternoon. We have a rehersal tonight. Hopefully Mel and I will be able to get Haduni right. It's not the dance really - it's the changes that makes it into a duet that will trip me up if anything does.
I marked my Gr 10s test and unfortunately there weren't any really funny answers. It wasn't really that kind of test. There is nothing funny about them sayign that
Yesterday I went to belly dance class after skipping troupe practice because I was dying. I managed fine and only had a problem with my snotterfall when bending over and stretching. This bodes well for the Chilli Festival tomorrow afternoon. We have a rehersal tonight. Hopefully Mel and I will be able to get Haduni right. It's not the dance really - it's the changes that makes it into a duet that will trip me up if anything does.
I marked my Gr 10s test and unfortunately there weren't any really funny answers. It wasn't really that kind of test. There is nothing funny about them sayign that
is a short cut for paste. (For those of you who aren't familiar with short cuts it's the wrong answer)
I starting teaching my matrics the VLOOKUP function in excel today. The one class ahd lots of questions and couldn't understand certain things and the other class was, "Whatever, look I can do it after your first explanation". And yet there is no significant difference in their average marks for each class respectively. Just goes to show how each group of people have a different dynamic and way of functioning.
I'm bored now.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Cypatriots
My new word is "Cypatriots". I have a collegue who is Cyprian and quite proud of it. There's nothing worng with being proud of your heritage but you can merge the words "Cypriot" or "Cyprian" with "patriot" very nicely. I'm not sure if there are others that you could do it with (I'm sure there are), but I don't feel like trying. I'm lazy that way. New words should come naturally.
Anyway, I'm slowly getting better. I can breathe through one nostral at a time, although my throat still hurts and I'm cough up great balls of muscous.
I hate Med-lemon, but it does seem to work. The reason I hate it is that the acidity, bitterness and temperature all remind me of vomit. It's always my last resort when I don't seem to be getting better.
Yesterday I had to go to the all delightful Access 2007 course at NMMU. Again it turned out to be thrillingly boring. What tipped me over the edge was when the lecturer said, "And now which datatype would we use for a field called Date?" - I actually gasped "Oh My God". I can't believe the level of this course. We are all supposed to be teaching this stuff and yet these people can't even do the simplest of things.
Anyway, I'm slowly getting better. I can breathe through one nostral at a time, although my throat still hurts and I'm cough up great balls of muscous.
I hate Med-lemon, but it does seem to work. The reason I hate it is that the acidity, bitterness and temperature all remind me of vomit. It's always my last resort when I don't seem to be getting better.
Yesterday I had to go to the all delightful Access 2007 course at NMMU. Again it turned out to be thrillingly boring. What tipped me over the edge was when the lecturer said, "And now which datatype would we use for a field called Date?" - I actually gasped "Oh My God". I can't believe the level of this course. We are all supposed to be teaching this stuff and yet these people can't even do the simplest of things.
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