Test Bloopers

So, as a teacher I get to mark tests and exams. Sometimes the only thing that keeps you going are the silly answers the student wrote down. I like to document these so that others can have a good laugh as well. (Please note that the spelling mistakes are their's not mine)
The first question:
What does the following stand for?
DIMM - Desktop internet method metobolic
- Digital intergate memory module
- Dual intercides memory
- Duel interlinen memory moduel
LCD - Limited central devise
- Litrise central device
- Lean computer desktop
- Laser computer desktop
- Low cost desktop
- Lower censed diameter
- Low carhage design
- Liquid computer device
CPU - Continous power usage
ADSL - Accessible digital secondary line
- Analysing digital software liability
- African digital service line
- Asymetric Digital service network
- Assymetric dual symetric line
3G - 3 dimensional

Question 2: Give a term for the following:
A printer that can print carbon copies. - not matrix
Software that can turn a pdf into editable software. - MWeb
The practice of healthy, safe and comfortable computing. - Computer Periperals - E-scrap - Eticket
The total amount of data that can be carried from one point to another in a given time period. - Broadwidth - Flash cards - Brandwith - copy - 3000 bytes
Question 3: What would you upgrade in this computer? (they have specs) - LCD so you don't get RSI
Why would your parents want a DVD writer weh nthey already have a CD writer? - They can use firewire and watch visuals.

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